Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Man Week 2010

There are defining moments in any man’s life: learning a Windsor knot, sipping that first beer with dad, buying a 40-inch flat screen TV, etc. For all testosterone-generating dudes, the desire to measure his worth in repairs and construction is ubiquitous. Some men tackle this challenge by remodeling a bathroom or rebuilding an engine. I am not those men. My benchmarks are markedly more rudimentary.

“Man Week 2010” started on 11/27 when I winterized the backyard (put picnic table in shed), and continued on 11/28 when B and I collaborated to build a breakfast table and two stools (insert wooden dowels and screw in twelve bolts with an Allen wrench). The holiday season is an electrician’s dream, providing ample opportunity to channel Bob Villa (find the broken bulb and set the timer), and no fix-it foray is complete without plumbing (pour Drano in the tub, wait 15 minutes, and rinse).

Alas, my stint of male domination ended with a shovel, a driveway, and seven inches of lake effect snow. The flakes could not escape my wrath, and the ice crystals could not outlast my unbridled attack of the asphalt. Unfortunately, neither could the pinched nerve in my back. “Man Week 2010” ended with me feeling like a man, alright: a 75-year old one. Somebody bring me some ice and Advil.



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